An Unexpected Love (Grell Sutcliff x Reader)

    I keep convincing myself that I'm not doing anything wrong, sitting here. Yesterday on the task they had to send me with someone else. My supervisor said that soul collecting isn't a game and I can't go on my own. Great, so I am the only girl shinigami around I am in a constant need of help. Men. And there you go, from the whole Department they had to send me Grell Sutcliff. The one I ridiculously fell in love quite a while ago. Which was and still is a complete suicide since Grell was interested only in men. I'm almost always by his side, not missing a thing. Still a "best friend" in his list, Nothing more that I haven't seen out of his constant facade of emotions and overreacting, sometimes insanity.
  The problem, you know, is that yesterday I... well I got almost killed by the life record I had to take.. It all happened so quickly. Me and Grell were just going to get it and all I had to do is to cut it off. But I was too slow, the life record rebelled against me with such speed. I had to be dead right now. I had to be dead if it wasn't Grell to cut the record before it slices me in half. Instead Grell got himself hurt. Really badly. The record pierced through his chest just below the heart. Because of me.
  I sighed. At least he's still alive. I was sitting on a bed, in a silent room in the Department, away from any noises. The only sound in the room was one rhythmical and one non-rhythmical breathing. Right before me Grell was lying unconscious. I haven't left the room a day and a half and he was still sleeping. At least I got plenty of time to watch him for hours. His white shirt was unbuttoned and his chest was wrapped in bandages. It hurt me even to look at him.
  He's got this aura of sinister beauty. A gorgeous shell with a poison inside. Maybe that's why no one ever dares to go near him. Except me of course. I guess I've always searched for problems since a little. I am enchanted by him. I envy his freedom. His bright colors get me sad, but I love it. And that's why I'm always so close to him. So close that I could touch him. But I can't.
  My thoughts couldn't go further, because it seems he was waking up. He surely was in great pain judging by the muffled sounds and the shattered sigh that got out of him, probably instinctively. He opened his eyes a bit. Maybe I shouldn't be so close to him, but still I stood still.
  He reached for his head and moaned in pain. Then he turned slowly to me fixing his green orbs on me in confusion.
  - Where are my glasses?- whispered he seriously, that's so not him.
  The strong pain should've erased his usual humor. I took his red glasses from the bedside table and gave them to him. He struggled finally to get into a sitting position and put his glasses on. When he finally looked at me I didn't realize that I was staring him and instantly lowered my eyes.
  - What are you doing here, darling? Don't you have work to do? - I couldn't read his mood, any intonation was missing.
  - Well, I...I'm glad you're fine. -I ignored the exact answer.- No, you're not fine. And... it's all my fault. - I kept watching the sheets. I realized just now how upset I am.
  - WELL, of course it was your fault. It's not my duty to kill myself every time a stupid person wants to collect souls. I am a professional shinigami and everyone is acting like I don't even matter. -He tried to get off the bed annoyed. I noticed he was shaking a bit. - William treats me like garbage. What do you all want from me??
  Now that's my Grell. His words made me feel better. Now I know that I have nothing to lose, do I?
  While he held his hand to his chest, still trying to get out of the bed, I gripped his shirt and pulled it lightly.
  - You matter to me, Grell. - I said quietly. It was getting awkward, so I added: You'll get worse if you don't stay in the bed for...a while.
  He turned around and looked at me, then at my hand, holding his shirt. He was looking more manly without make up. His firm jaw line and austere profile were revealing his masculine nature, despite all his efforts to hide it. His face was more pale than usual. The crimson hair was making it almost marble white. He stood still for a moment like he was wondering if it's worth it to oppose me, but finally sighed and turned back slowly under the sheets.
  His moods were changing more often that girl's moods do. Plus, Grell never listens to anyone but himself. So...yeah. I am so lucky that he's broken right now and heard me, yet I'm terrified of what follows. I tried to distract him.
  - You look absolutely awful - I laughed.
  - I know, I know! Thank you for sharing, keep your disparaging remarks for yourself. - He cut me off. Oops. It was so amusing to tease him. - And you're here because...?
     Rright.
  - I...uhm - I looked down again and started playing with the sheet in my hands- Because I was worried about you.
  I tried to stay calm. Silence. Where did my noisy and insane Grell Sutcliff go? Oh no, no. I felt tears on my cheeks. Why do I betray myself like that? I've always been the fighting, "never crying" type girl. That was why death interests me so much. But now...
  - Come here, darling. -He said so gently that I raised my head is surprise. He reached for my hand and I found myself sitting in his lap. I had no other wish but to hug him. I wrapped my hands around him and held him tight. He winced.
  - I-I am so sorry -I tried my best to stop the tears from falling, but with no success. Honestly I wasn't quite sure what exactly got me so upset. Maybe because of the one thing I wanted to say to him for so many years and  never saying it.
  - Wait a second, I am the one who should cry. Why are you stealing my moment? - he exclaimed.
   I forced myself  to smile a bit. Then separated myself from him leaving a few inches between us.
  - You are so cold. - I held his hands in mine and I didn't even care what he thinks about it. I felt like the air wasn't enough for me.
  He looked down on me. His eyes, same as always, so alive, were filled with countless emotions.
  - What's wrong? You don't look ok. - He stated.
  - Do you want the truth? - I asked and met his worried eyes, inches away from mine.
  - Go ahead - I was glad he was at least trying to be serious.
  - I am afraid I'm in love with you - I smiled again, but I'm sure I looked scary with tears falling down on my face. - I'm in love with you from the moment I saw you and I can't do nothing about it.
  He stood still like a statue fixing his gaze on me. Then he smiled, showing his perfectly white shark-shaped teeth.
  - Well, dear, I- you know I- He was slightly confused. -You don't ever act like a girl, you're always so serious, you love fighting, you love death. You know I prefer men-
   I opened my mouth to say something, but he lifted his forefinger before I can say something.
  - But! You are an exception, darling...- I didn't get where was this conversation was going at all. - I found out that... When you are...I get...You don't... - He gave up and stopped talking with a horrified expression on his face.
  I realized I was expecting the impossible.
  - I think I should be leaving then - I started to get up. - I won't disturb you anymore.
  Right when I was going to get up he grabbed my hand.
  -I- I might have fallen in love with you - He said quickly.
     I faced him. He removed his glasses looking focused on their black chain.
- What? Grell, are you making fun of me? -He lied even for his gender, what am I expecting.  -Because I swear -
  He drew me back into his arms, tightening his hand around my waist. He leaned his forehead on mine, closing his eyes. Ice and fire. I couldn't move, I couldn't escape, but why would I want to?
  - Of all people I might not really know what love is. -He laughed hysterically- All I know is that I feel bad when you're missing. And it drives me mad.- He stressed his last words. -Isn't that love?
  - How dare you, sadistic bastard!- I drew myself away from his face and stood up a bit looking at him. He bit his lip and inclined his head a bit. I felt my blood heating up my face. My anger was gone in just a second.
  - I was supposed to blush. Not you.
  - Someone has to be the man - I shrugged. Silence fell again. - Are you sure you...like me?
 - Of course I like you, sweetheart. -He giggled.
  His eyes were burning playfully,  hiding thoughts forever mysterious to me.
  - Are you my girl? - he asked imitating my girly tone.
  - I am.
  - Fine. I can try to play the man for you. - He whispered.
  - Have you ever kissed a girl?
  - I can try. It shouldn't be hard. I suppose. - He was watching me thoughtfully. He was so focused that it was comical.
  He inclined a bit more and his lips found mine. I pulled myself to him as closer as I could. Taking advantage of his dominating height at the moment he pushed me down on the bed. I could finally answer his kiss without worrying .
  - Grell...- As I thought he didn't know what delicacy means, forcing his kisses, while I still couldn't move from his strong grip. Fortunately he was still wounded.
  - Aah! Hurts!- He complained slackening his hands. He met my eyes and his light green flames got darker.
  - You deserve that for making me suffer away from you for so long - I said between the kisses, smiling.
  - OUCH!
  - Drama queen...